Iliman Ndiaye, Harlem Globetrotters-Level Skills and Revealing Soccer Statistics

COULD IT ACTUALLY HAPPEN?

Unless you’ve missed the clip of Iliman Ndiaye performing a reverse bouncing nutmeg at Everton’s training ground, you should check it out. By pulling off a move so nasty that it would have fit right in at a Harlem Globetrotters exhibition match, the skill immediately shut down what was meant to be a lighthearted kickabout to finish what had been – up to that point – an revealing conversation about how amateur players can secure a fresh start after being released by professional academies.

Ndiaye, who played Sunday League football directly before being signed by Sheffield United at 19, is ideally suited to discuss this topic. “Avoid dwelling on the rejection and one day your luck is going to materialize,” he informed a young player just before deploying said ninja move on his opponent, in doing so perfectly illustrating the gap between Premier League and amateur footballers he had been attempting to dispel.

Ndiaye is far from the only professional footballer to go slightly overboard. A younger Michael Owen cheerfully overwhelming a young shot-stopper in front of a annoyed Neville Southall is obviously the gold standard in this unique area – but the ex-Anfield star is just one of many culprits. Both Christian Eriksen and Shinji Kagawa have reduced toddlers to actual tears with a series of merciless tricks, although it’s considered that the latter was at least motivated by the Japanese player’s social media apologetic post – “this frustration makes a person stronger” – and the associated label of #friendship.

Kagawa’s former Dortmund teammates Lukasz Piszczek, Jakub Blaszczykowski and Nuri Sahin at least had the manners to suffer a loss against 100 children when the trio competed during the half-time break of their final match for BVB. A Real Madrid XI that contained Cristiano Ronaldo and Xabi Alonso showed less mercy when they played against 109 Chinese kids in a comparable scenario. But returning to the beginning, it’s calculated that only 180 of the 1.5 million boys currently playing structured junior soccer in England will ever feature in the Premier League, a sobering statistic for toddlers and teenagers across the country.

BROADCAST ON MAJOR PLATFORM

Join Scott Murray from 19:45 Greenwich Mean Time for live international football action of England versus Serbia, while Luke McLaughlin will be on clockwatch duty for the rest of the night’s action.

QUOTE OF THE DAY

“Soccer carried me but it never left me because I never gave up on my goal. I went from location to location. The devotion to the game drives you. I couldn’t always see where it was taking me. But today I have the understanding” – Serbia coach Veljko Paunovic pauses briefly from his training to discuss his career.

FAN FEEDBACK

“Pleasant to learn that Kevin Mac Allister won’t be excluded by Argentina. With luck, if he goes to the Bigliest Most Peaceful Cup next year, he’ll study how to navigate the host cities – wouldn’t want him to end up lost in New York” – James Humphries.

“Reports indicate that 1,024 players in the Turkish league have been suspended due to suspected participation in a gambling controversy. It would be wonderful if that number could be increased to the same level of characteristic precision associated with Football Daily – that is, 1,057 readers. By my estimation, that’s about 33 more pedants. If I offer to be suspended from playing professionally in Turkey (not much of a loss at my age and, um, skill level), are there 32 more folks willing to participate in my quest for harmony?” – Mike Wilner.

“As a daily reader and Florida resident, can I preemptively object about the next several days of published letters about which route one uses to get to various locations in your island nation? I mean, I was stuck in gridlock on I-4 at 2am on a Tuesday night driving through Orlando once, but that’s the whole story. There’s no rewarding moral to the tale. (I-4 joins Tampa on the Gulf Coast to Daytona on the Atlantic via Orlando/Walt Disney World, and can have delays at any time)” – Rasteen Nowroozi.

“Regarding Wythenshawe FC, I remember many years ago playing for a Sunday, very casual team, Turnpike Lane Hibs, on Clapham Common. One morning a bloke presented as ‘Danny’ turned up to play. I have no idea who invited him. Apparently he was an actor; he had a good left side. (Yes, Daniel Day-Lewis)” – Jason Steger.

“Together with some co-workers and mates, I play a game of football each Friday afternoon. Our oldest player is approaching eighty, while the least experienced are in their twenties. To ensure a positive atmosphere for everyone, we have a basic guideline regarding the quality of player: you can be fast or skilled, but preferably not simultaneously. We sometimes have players who violate this rule, but usually succeed in bringing them to our standard over time” – Lars Esbjerg.